Kindergarten Funnies

There is never a day in Kindergarten without a laugh.  Five-year-olds are pretty entertaining.  I thought I would share some of the Kindergarten funnies that I experience on a daily basis...

• When asked why she pulled a card, one little girl said she did not know why she had pulled a card.  I said, "Daisy*, you cannot play until you tell me why you had to pull a card today."  She responds with a sigh, "Well...I was in Daisy's world..."  After a giggle, I told her "Yes, you were in Daisy's world, but when you are at school you are in Mrs. Markham's world so you have to listen & follow directions."  In amazement, she replied, "Mrs. Markham's world?!"  Who knew the world didn't revolve around me?!  LOL  (*Name changed)
• One little boy came in one day saying that his pants kept falling down.  I glanced at them & they seemed okay, so I didn't think anything of it.  After finishing his morning work later, the little boy stood up to put his papers away.  Out of the corner of my eye I saw his pants hit the floor & him quickly blush & pick them up.  I giggled & immediately went over to him to let him know that he hadn't buttoned or zipped his pants.  He responded with a smile, "My Mom didn't do it."  What would we do without our mothers?!
• A few years ago a little girl would not listen to me or my assistant at the beginning of the school. year.  At one point, she told my assistant "no"!  So, I took her out into the hallway to talk to her about how we behave at school.  She told me, "I'm queen of this town & I make the rules.  I'm the golden child."  After explaining to her that the principal is in charge at school, she was an angel the rest of the year.  :)
• A previous student of mine asked if my kids this year were behaving.  He said that he would come talk to them if they weren't.  He said, "I can calm them by my singing.  Do they like massages?"
• Teacher: "There's no talking right now."  Student: "I'm just talking to myself."  LOL - well that's okay then!
• When telling the kids about my birthday the next day, I told them I was going to be seven years old.  Their response - "Congratulations!"  :)
• In celebration of my birthday one of the students told me to "bring popsicles!"  I thought I was supposed to receive the gifts! 
• Another student told me that he was going to buy me chatter teeth for my birthday.  Can't beat that gift!
• When I asked one student to pull a card for talking in the hallway, she responded, "No, I put a bubble.  You no see it!"  So cute!!  (The kids have bubbles & ducktails in the hallway so they are not talking & keep their hands to themselves.)
• One student told me that her Mom's birthday was coming up & "she will be five, like me!"
• We were drawing things that are red today & I told the students they needed to be using red crayons.  One student asked, "Ummm, can I draw pencil for the little circles for strawberry, the nuts?"  Who knew strawberries have nuts?  :)
• Student: "Mrs. Markham, why's he black?" Me: "That's just what he is.  Why are you white?"  Student: "Maybe he sat in the sun."
• After a crazy day with the kids (they were a bit wild), one student said, "It was a nice birthday for you today.  I like your birthday.  I love you birthday so much.  You get a kiss for that."
• Me to my class: "All I need for my birthday is for you guys to be on your best behavior." One student yells: "& some new clothes!" Ouch - guess he didn't like my Tie dyed Alvaton t-shirt!
• Student: "My mom's white, my dad's black, & I'm Mexican." 
• Little girl to the class: "Okay everybody, raise your hand if you think I'm beautiful."
• A student who had been pulling several cards during previous days for making bad choices said, "I went to get on the computer & bam I was on the computer.  I went to get a book & bam I had a book."   He was excited that he could just do things without making bad choices!  :)
• After asking a student to keep his hands to himself several times during rest, I look over to find him hitting another student on the head with his blanket.  I called to the student & he said, "My hands were to myself."  Pretty smart...

Stay tuned...more to come, I'm certain!