Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Unconditional Love

I'm learning a lot about unconditional love lately. 

As I've mentioned before, one of the hardest things about this pregnancy has been that I feel as though I have neglected Kai (our weimeraner).  Whether it has been from lack of energy to having to guard my belly to protect this sweet little girl, I have not been able to give Kai as much attention as he used to get.  I get emotional at times & ask Paul if Kai is ever going to love me the same again.  I just don't see how he could love me the same.  But none-the-less, Kai is still super happy to see me when I come home.  & I hope he can bear with me for the next few weeks until I can get back to my old self again!  Paul assures me that Kai still loves me - one of the best things about dogs.  They are so good natured & love you unconditionally. 

Paul has also been loving me unconditionally.  These last couple of weeks of pregnancy have been draining on me (& Paul too, I'm sure!).  I am doing my best to make it through the day at work with a class full of 5-year-olds.  (I'm not sure how well I'm doing, but the kids are all making it home safely!)  But, when I come home at night, I am exhausted!!  Paul has been great to me throughout the entire pregnancy, but lately he has pretty much been doing everything outside of hand feeding me!  He is taking care of the house, cooking dinner, taking care of Kai, picking up things for me that I need to take to work, etc. etc. etc...  Let me also add, that I may not be the most pleasant person to be around right now!  When I'm not sleeping, I am often crying (for no reason) or getting upset because I ran out of muffins & I'm too tired to fix more.  So, I figure, Paul must really love me in order to put up with my craziness & take such good care of our family.  I am so thankful to have such a wonderful husband & I know he is going to be a wonderful father as well. 

I am also a little bit surprised to find that I already love this little girl in my belly more than I would have ever imagined.  I did not realize it was possible to love someone that you have never really met.  But, I am learning quickly how possible it is!  I know that I already love Nolin Leigh unconditionally.  I am sure in time she will be growing up & doing things I might not always approve of, but she will always be my little girl.  I'm beginning to understand what my mom has told me all these years - there is no love like your mother's!
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